Archive for the 'Humor' Category

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Jungle book

Published on September 19, 2006 in blog, Humor, Just for Jolly and pastime. 8 Comments

Who will forget the jungle book? One of the most viewed Indian TV series for children of 1990s. If I still have my memory cells working, I would say that it was aired in DD1 (Doordarshan National) on every Sunday at 11.00 AM. There we were sitting in front of the TV for the next half an hour unmoved. I used to sing the title of the jungle book series by heart that time. All the characters in the series tied us up in front of the TV every week. The series was fictional and had a lot of interesting lessons of life. I did not know it as I was kid then. Now that I watched jungle book after a long time in a DVD, I realize it. Salute to Rudyard Kipling for such a wonderful story. I have listed out some of the characters I remember below.

Mowgli – the small boy with his boomerang tied up in his underwear and he happened to be the hero of the story.

Baloo – the bear

Bhageera – the black panther

Shere Khan – the tiger

The one I like the most was Baloo – the bear. He was really cute and always protected Mowgli. Which character do you like?

Here is an Odeo of the title song sung by me.

Thanks for putting up with my harsh voice. I apologise if the lyrics is wrong. It will be great if you can sing the jungle book lyrics for me. I will display it here and will have people rate it. Game?

Airtel Super singer

Published on July 13, 2006 in Humor, Just for Jolly, music and pastime. 7 Comments

I commute to office by train and it takes around 2 hours to reach Tambaram (where my office is) from Ambattur (where my home is). I kill the time either listening to music or reading a book. One fine evening, on my way to office, as usual was listening to songs on radio. The train was not much crowded and I got myslef a corner seat. I usually have the habit of singing songs when I commute by train. singer Getting myslef seated in the corner, I started singing with great fervor and was facing the window all the while. I did not want others to spot me singing.

Few minutes passed and I was at peak singing along with Hariharan. Radio mirchi was airing anbae anbae from Jeans which happens to be one of Hariharan’s best and I was really into it. The train had stopped for signal which I had not noticed. There was a pat on my shoulder and I turned around to see a elderly passenger trying to convey something to me. Took my headphones off to hear him. (original conversation was in tamil).

Old Man : ” thambi! what’s your problem? Is there anyway I can help you with? I have been watching you from the park station and you have been trying to do something with your headphones on. Please do consider other people travelling with you.”

Me : “%*@$$##!!!”

Off he went in the next station. I had a strong feeling that the other passengers were smirking at me. Switched the radio off and continued my journey quietly.

Next evening I was at home surfing channels. Airtel super singer aired on Vijay TV, hosted by Chinmayi, caught my attention. A good programme to search for voice talent. The winner gets a chance to sing in Harris Jeyaraj’s (a well known music director) tamil flick. Hopes of me becoming a super singer started glimmering again! When I told the above incident to one of my friends, she said that certain people and certain things in the world can never be changed and I am one of them. I asked her the following question and got a great response.

Me : Hey! Can I become a super singer?

She : God only knows!

hehe!

Mosquito catcher zapper

Published on July 2, 2006 in General stuff, Humor, Just for Jolly and people. 0 Comments

Call him a techie!

Call him a web-master!

Call him a good friend!

Call him whatever you want. Ladies and gentlemen, I hereby announce the one and only champion of mosquito catching. It is Balaji. As a way of appreciation, let us all visit his blog thrice a week. Believe me or not, I witnesses him using a small lamp with a banish or a good-night mat at its top. He used to improvise it and kill a lot of mosquitoes then.

I don’t know why he is so much against this poor insect. Balaji, any specific reasons?
Now that dad has got him a tennis-bat-like mosquito catcher, he has started hitting them like Pete Samprass. Gosh! I will try to post the photo of him with this mosquito catching device. It is highly sophiticated that he charges it daily. If I ever lose a job what am I going to do next? Balaji! you don’t have to fear much. With Chennai becoming the mosquito breeding factory, you have a bright career ahead.

P.S.:- When I mean “the one and only” – he is the only participant in the competition of mosquito catching.

A customer service joke

Published on July 2, 2006 in Humor and Just for Jolly. 0 Comments

Adding up to my post on humorous customer service calls, I have a joke to share with everyone. This was forwarded by my colleague and I really enjoyed this one as it involved Microsoft and its customer service.

Here it goes,

A plain computer illeterate guy rings tech
support to report that his computer is faulty.
Tech: What’s the problem?
User: There is smoke coming out of the power supply.
Tech: You’ll need a new power supply.
User: No, I don’t! I just need to change the startup
files.
Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty. You’ll need
to re place it.
User: No way! Someone told me that I just needed to
change the startup and it will fix the problem! All I need is
for you to tell me the command.

10 minutes later, the User is still adamant that he
is right. The tech is frustrated and fed up.
Tech: Sorry, Sir. We don’t normally tell our
customers this, but there is an undocumented DOS command that will fix
the problem.

User: I knew it!
Tech: Just add the line LOAD NOSMOKE.COM at the end
of the CONFIG.SYS. Letme know how it goes.

10 minutes later.
User: It didn’t work. The power supply is still
smoking.
Tech: Well, what version of DOS are you using?
User: MS-DOS 6.22.
Tech: That’s your problem there. That version of DOS
didn’t come with
NOSMOKE. Contact Microsoft and ask them for a patch
that will give you ! the file. Let me know how it goes.

1 hour later.
User: I need a new power supply.
Tech: How did you come to that conclusion?
User: Well, I rang Microsoft and told him about what
you said, and he
started asking questions about the make of power
supply.
Tech: Then what did he say?
User: He told me that my power supply isn’t
compatible with NOSMOKE

“Manja Saara” – the Golden colured snake

Published on May 22, 2006 in Humor, Just for Jolly, places to go and Travel. 17 Comments

Last week, I was in kerala for a colleague’s wedding. It was my first visit to the coconut paradise. I was gob-smacked by the scenic beauty of the state. After the marriage in Palghat, I and Sabaree (my colleague) headed to Ottapalam. Ottapalam is a small town with great views of the nature. After visiting Sabaree’s relatives there, we headed down to Guruvayur. On our way, I asked, our driver-cum-guide, Mr.Velayudham (aka) Aiyaapan to stop the car to attend nature’s call number one. I was running towards the bush and there Sabaree spotted the yellow snake. It is called by the name “manja saara” in tamil. It was around 6ft in length and golden in colour. forgetting the urgency to pee, I clicked the scene with my Konica Minolta film SLR. I was 3-4 ft from her. It was truly the biggest snake I have ever seen in my entire life.

This incident reminds me a couple of things people always say when they speak about snakes.

“paambu padam edukkum”. In my case, I took the picture of the snake.

“paamba partha onnukku vandhudum”. whereas, “naan onnukku adikkum pothu paamba paarthen”.

The highlight was when Velayudham asked me to pee somewhere inside the bush as the snake was sitting comfortably outside. I never wanted to gamble and forgot my venture of peeing in the woods.

History of my Internet life

Published on April 9, 2006 in Humor, Internet and Just for Jolly. 3 Comments

I started to use internet after I finished my 12th grade. only by 2000, internet became popular in and was affordable. I spent the first few years of my internet life only creating email ids. I think I had around a dozen then. I used to pay Rs.30, only for checking all the dozzen mailboxes, for an hour. In fact, people with a email id were real geeks that time in India.�weird???????

Then I got introduced to Mouthshut. I increased my dad’s monthly phone bills a lot only because of this website. Idea behind mouthshut was to get people writing reviews for different categories of products. I was a very active writer in mouthshut till a year ago. Even I had a profile created for myself in mouthshut. Then the mp3 download mania caught me too. I started to search the web for mp3s of tamil and english songs and was downloading them. Mind you, I had a dial-up connection that time. It took hours and hours to download�just a few songs. All I did while downloading mp3s was to login to all my dozen email accounts and delete the junk mails I receive. The truth was that junk mails were the only ones I received for months.

By 2004, broadband internet was introduced to India and I was one of the early getters. After installing broadband, my area of browsing shifted to technical stuff. I started to read a lot of technical articles and also enrolled myself in geekstogo. Geekstogo is a free computer help forum. Here, I learnt a lot of technical and troubleshooting techniques for PCs. By this time, I had retained three email addresses and used only those.

Now that I have started my own weblog, I have started to read other blogs and comment on them too. I was speaking about this to one of colleagues over a cup of coffee and found that his internet life history resembles mine. Is this generic?

Customer service calls can be humorous

Published on April 1, 2006 in Humor. 5 Comments

I have been working as a customer service representative for nearly two years. One thing which keeps me going are the humorous ones. Ever heard people laughing about the dumbest customer calls? I have experienced a few myself. Here are a few.

One fine day, I had a customer who called for resetting his domain password. I did reset his password and conveyed it to him. It had two dollar signs in it. Believe me, the next thing he asked me was “Are the dollars in upper case or lower case?” I was at my wits’ end. I did not know whether to cry or laugh at this. As always, I was courteous and explained that the letters are in upper case and dollar sign is the one which is in the number four key on the keyboard.
One of my colleague was laughing his heart out after finishing a call. when asked why, his response was that the caller was not able to identify the # key on the keyboard. He has tried by all means to explain where it is located in the keyboard. After battling it out for 10 mins, the response from the caller was that he was using a US keyboard and not one from India. huh??????????
Once, I had a customer who was really grumbling about what has happened to his PC after all his service calls to India and he was at the point of throwing his PC out of the window. As a patient technician, I tried to help him starting from the basics. He was really irritated and he agreed to co-operate after a lot of persuasion from my end. His problem was that, after speaking to one of our tech he is not able to see anything in his screen. I looked at the previous case notes and found that the problem was with windows registry and it was sorted out. The tech has closed the ticket as resolved. I asked to check whether there was power in the PC and he said there was no power. I asked him to take off the power cords from the mains and plug it in again. He did so but there was no power coming on to the PC. I was curious enough to see whether there was power supply for his entire home. He said that it was gone after speaking to our last tech. I explained him that there was no problem with our tech or with the PC and it might be some problem with his local electricity board. He never agreed and was cursing how outsourcing has degraded the type of service they get. Controlling all my temper and at my softest voice, I asked him to check out with the neighbourhood. He dialled up one of his neighbours and found that there was a power failure in the locality. He went ahead and told me that it might be due to the changes our previous tech has done to his PC that the power in the locality has gone down. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhh!

Customer service calls can be humorous. Believe me. They are.